imtalkinghere

Have I mentioned my mother?

There’s this bit of infrequent shtick here at our house. I’ll be expressing some curiosity or testing a  perception on something, and the Greek will stop cold what he is doing, point at me with a straight-out arm and announce loudly, “Not normal!”

As in “That’s not how people think”, though I prefer to cling to Deepak’s Chopra’s definition of health: “What we call normal is merely the psychopathology of the average.”

Well, I have to say, if I am not “normal”, this is in large part due to my mother, who is less “normal” than I. I offer as Exhibit A, the following report she filed some years ago:

One day, my two grown children were discussing the Transcendental Meditation Siddha Program, and one asked the other to define Siddha abilities. As the other began to list them, the ability that captured my imagination was “Omniscience.”- “Now, that would be wonderful!” I thought to myself.

Many years later, in May 2002, I was teaching a Reiki II class. The students were especially intuitive and insightful, and at the end of the class, when I turned it over to Q&A, they began asking me questions I had never been asked before, had never even heard asked, and didn’t know the answers to. And yet, lo and behold, I was answering them, and as I answered, I knew the answers were right.

The light/energy in that room was unlike anything I’d ever experienced with a class. I knew something special was happening, but what? And just as I was thinking this, I saw that the question being asked was coming toward me as though on a ribbon. As the ribbon approached me, another ribbon with the answer was rising from a deep well within me, and the ribbons passed each other in front of me. As this continued, I realized that for any question posed, the answer would rise. Amazing.

And then it was time to end the class and the students moved out the door, me still floating in this light-filled state. The very last one was standing beside me and she said, “I just read a book about General George Armstrong Custer and, believe me, he was not a nice man!” I had turned toward her and saw that this statement was coming toward me on a ribbon, and a ribbon was arising within me and as it emerged, I saw a name written on it… George W. Bush.”

My students were barely out of my driveway before I was on the phone to my daughter in California, telling her about this experience. “George Bush, the reincarnation of George Custer – that was the feeling of the ribbon.” She suggested I read everything I could about Custer to see if there were similarities. Over the next couple of months I followed her advice, read numerous books, noted similarities ~ and there are many, many…

Several weeks later, as I poured over my stack of books, it occurred to me to ask which book my student had read,  in case it was one I had not discovered. I called her and said, “What was the name of the book you read on Custer?”

“I didn’t read a book on Custer.”

“Wait a minute. Didn’t you say as you left, 'I just read a book on George Armstrong Custer…?'”

“I didn’t say that.”

So what happened? Who did say that? I was looking right at her, her lips formed the words, and there came a ribbon, and it was her voice that said it.

I now think that my teachers on inner planes wanted me to have that information as part of the lessons they are teaching me on how a soul grows (or doesn't) through lifetimes, and are able to teach this not only through those I am in contact with in person, but also use people on the national stage as examples.

With teachers like that it’s hard to miss the message!

I believe now that, for that very brief period of time, I had the experience of Omniscience. I believe Omniscience must be on a fine level of the relative, probably very close to where you find the Akashic Records. I’m sure there’s someone out there who can explain it accurately, even draw diagrams of it, and maybe even access it at will, but I have not found them yet.

My mother.

Who, as I write this, is – at age 77 – on a road trip with her spectacular friend to master Dr. Eric Pearl’s ReConnection healing technique.

On another day, I can tell you about some maddening challenges that come with this terrain. But, overall, there’s no question - I’ll take this over “normal” any time.

And with this I formally note for the record one of the profound and awesome gratitudes of my life.

"One Nation, Under Stress"

Quiet here of late. The truth is I've been so depressed about all things American, and a few other things as well, that I didn't want to spew that mooooood all over this space. But last night I was flipping through a magazine and came upon something that cheered me considerably:

Since 9/11, America has behaved like a battered spouse, says psychologist Martha Stout, Ph.D., in her powerful new book The Paranoia Switch: How Terror Rewires our Brains and Reshapes our Behavior - And How We Can Reclaim our Courage (Sarah Crichton Books). We've been collectively traumatized and subsequently dominated by fear, she says, only to become demoralized, paralyzed, and separated from the values and passions that once guided us as a nation. Drawing from her work with trauma patients and her teachings at Harvard Medical School, Stout makes the case for applying the psychological model of trauma on the brain, body, and behavior to the nation as a whole. Seen in this light, the instigating events of 9/11 are just part of the problem. The rest comes from people with political purposes who are "motivated to keep your subliminal fear and your sense of dread at a simmering point." Fortunately, a nation, like an abused spouse, can break free and heal, Stout says. She details a plan to assess anxiety, identify the myths and realities of the threat, protect ourselves against fearmongers, and regain  hope.  "Our continued fear has had large scale social and political implications," she writes. "And healing from it is more than an individual health objective - it is a national mission. Striving to be calmer, more aware, and more rational is, arguably, a patriotic act." This is one of the year's most illuminating books.

"Cheered by this?" you say. Yes. Because we're well past time to be talking about what's really broken. And how it has been made worse by small, dangerously unwise, so-called leaders.

I sure hope the reviewer is right about illumination, because we're definitely overdue for light. Time to recognize and talk - and I mean serious talk  - about the core material at the heart of what really ails us. And specific steps we can take to self-correct.

Show me a viable presidential candidate who gets this and pledges commitment to concrete healing steps as a national mission, and I'm on board.

In the meantime, we should all be pressing media outlets to start a whole new order of conversation about what we "need" to do.

"Clinically Incapable"

Let us note that it was John Edwards who got it exactly right on the Scooter Libby commutation:

"Only a president clinically incapable of understanding that mistakes have consequences could take the action he did today."

Clinically Incapable - What a perfect title for the authoritative biography of George Bush! Clinically incapable of so many things. Except serving himself.

Obviously, the choice to commute instead of pardon was designed to continue obstructing  justice, one of the several charges for which Libby was found guilty. Commutation keeps his crony out of jail while allowing the farce of ongoing court proceedings which Bush and Gang can continue to use as their excuse for not answering legitimate questions. The pardon will come later.

Cynical. Self-Serving. Bastard.
Pretending he deliberated in service to justice.
Splitting the difference, my ass.
The guy is a study in perfect shamelessness.

How is it that I got this immediately,  others have recognized the same...

"[T]he real effect of Bush's actions is to prevent Libby from revealing the truth about Bush's -- and vice president Cheney's -- own actions in the leak. By commuting Libby's sentence, Bush protected himself and his vice president from potential criminal exposure for their actions in the CIA Leak. As such, Libby's commutation is nothing short of another obstruction of justice." - Marcy Wheeler

...some even predicted it ...

Libby trial book coauthor Jeff Lomonaco, in an op-ed he tried unsuccessfully to get published several weeks ago, predicted a commutation because "it would enable Bush and Cheney to continue the strategy they have successfully pursued in deterring journalists seeking their explanations with claims that they shouldn't comment on an ongoing legal proceeding. If Bush were to pardon Libby, he and Cheney would no longer have such a rationale for evading the press' questions - nor would Libby be able to claim the right against self-incrimination to resist testifying before Congress about the role that Cheney and Bush played in directing his conduct."   

h/t Froomkin

...but, so far, I'm not hearing the broadcast press put it out for conversation?

Talk about missing the forest. Talk about missing the trees. Talk about fiddling while the forest burns down around us.

See me jump. See me shout. See me sing and dance about!

I could not be more pleased to know that Digby – impeccable, articulate, astonishing Digby… the one about whom dozens (that I know of; maybe hundreds)  of bloggers write simply “What Digby Says”, because there is usually absolutely nothing more to add to what Digby has said - is a woman.

"I think my strength is in honing arguments and in connecting the dots that perhaps others don't." - Digby interview

Amen, sister. And to have it revealed (Go there now. No really, I insist.) as part of the Paul Wellstone Citizen Leadership Award… I mean!

Every now and then beautiful things come together to make  A Very Happy Day.

I’m going out to celebrate now. I may not be back in for a while.

Ah, memories...

We watched the Tony Awards tonight - all commercials on mute, as usual. At one point, I was seduced by the silent image of a New York City hansom cab.

ME
Next time we're in New York, let's take a horse-drawn carriage ride. I've never done that.

GREEK
We rode in a horse-drawn carriage.

ME
You mean in Egypt? Edfu? Kinda different. And wasn't that a donkey?

GREEK
No, in New Orleans. Remember the carriage ride?

ME
There was no carriage ride.

GREEK
Yes. We rode in a carriage. In New Orleans.

The room was pretty dark, but I swear I saw a dreamy look cross his face. We went to New Orleans for my birthday six years ago. How could I forget...?

I was blinking into space, trying to pull up some trace of memory ... Nuthin'.

ME
You're absolutely certain?  We - you and I - rode in a horse-drawn carriage in New Orleans?

Now he was staring into space...

GREEK
Oh. - Wait. - No... No... What it was is on the ride in from the airport, the cab stopped just to the side and behind a horse. His ass was right next to my window. I remember because he was wearing one of those buckets to catch his turds.

ME
Well, it's nice that you could turn that particular image into a romantic memory.

I mention this story for anyone who...

...wonders how it is that I fell in love with this fabulous creature...

...or doubts it when I - of the more reliable memory - say that we have laughed out loud together every single day of our going-on-ten-year marriage.

Impeachment Is Nowhere Near Enough ... or, IT'S ABOUT US, STUPID!

For a while there, I was getting daily "Impeach Bush" email updates. I didn't ask to be on the list and when my requests to be removed were ignored, I added the source to my SPAM list.  It's not that I think George W. Bush doesn't qualify for impeachment. I'm with Chalmers Johnson in understanding that this President has "of course, flagrantly violated his oath of office, which requires him 'to protect and defend the constitution'...(that) among the 'high crimes and misdemeanors' that, under other political circumstances, would surely constitute the Constitutional grounds for impeachment are these":

(T)he President and his top officials pressured the CIA to put together a National Intelligence Estimate (NIE) on Iraq's nuclear weapons that both the administration and the Agency knew to be patently dishonest. They then used this false NIE to justify and American war of aggression

(After launching this invasion,) the administration unilaterally reinterpreted international and domestic law to permit the torture of prisoners at Abu Ghraib.. at Guantanimo Bay, and at other secret locations around the world.

Nothing in the Constitution, least of all the commander-in-chief clause, permits the president to commit felonies. Nonetheless, within  days after the 9/11 attacks, President Bush had signed a secret executive order authorizing a new policy of "extraordinary rendition," in which the CIA is allowed to kidnap terrorist suspects anywhere on Earth and transfer them to prisons in countries…where torture is a normal practice, or to secret CIA prisons outside the United States where Agency operatives themselves do the torturing.

On the home front, despite the post-9/11 congressional authorization of new surveillance powers to the administration, its officials chose to ignore these and, on its own initiative, undertook extensive spying on American citizens without obtaining the necessary judicial warrants and without reporting to Congress on this program. These actions are prima-facie violations of the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act of 1978 (and subsequent revisions) and of Amendment IV of the Constitution.

These alone constitute more than adequate grounds for impeachment, while hardly scratching the surface.

Underlining mine. Yes, indeed, George W. Bush is a really, really inept and damaging President, probably the worst in our nation's history. His shocking disregard for the rule and spirit of law will be a central element in the story of his role in history...along with his poor critical-thinking skills,  his lack of actual leadership qualities, his unsound instincts (ignored months of 9/11 warnings, missed the import of the Katrina warnings  - something we actually have on tape, continually stokes fear and  negative instincts in the American people, etc.), his catastrophically bad decision-making, his deeply-flawed character judgments, and what appears to be his lifelong dishonesty at a cellular level. And that's just my short list.

So, it must be profoundly frustrating for pro-impeachment activists to deal with how difficult it has been to kindle their particular fire, even under people like me.

In Salon’s "Why Bush Hasn’t been Impeached" (subscription), Gary Kamiya cites multiple "factors -- the sacrosanct status of war, the public's complicity in an irrational demonstration of raw power...

“Congress, the media and most of the American people have yet to turn decisively against Bush because to do so would be to turn against some part of themselves.

"…Bush’s warmongering spoke to something deep in our national psyche…To impeach Bush would force us to directly confront our national core of violent self-righteousness – to come to terms with it, to understand it and reject it. And we’re not ready to do that…to turn decisively against Bush…would be to turn against some part of (our)selves."

...(and) the loss of respect for law, logic, and memory -- (that) have created a situation in which it is widely accepted that Bush's lies about Iraq (are) not impeachable or even that scandalous, but merely a matter of policy."

To which I say, uh... yes ...and no.

First, I think Americans are understandably averse to launching the impeachment process at a time when it might distract us from our greater moral responsibility to clean up the hellish messes we've got going in Iraq and Afghanistan and in New Orleans and elsewhere at home.

I also think we have to understand that Newt Gingrich's merry band of Republicans diminished the seriousness of impeachment when they used it against Bill Clinton. (Read John Dean's Conservatives Without Conscience - Most of those Republicans didn't even believe in it themselves! They were just following marching orders.)

But I think - I hope - that the major reason that even people like me are not focused on impeachment is because we realize - or at least sense - that George Bush's illegal behavior is as much symptom as cause. No president gets to do the kind of damage he has done in a system that works.   In other words, the problems we need to face are much, much bigger than George W. Bush.  As Al Gore said in a recent conversation (5.25.07) related to his new book, Assault on Reason -

"It's too easy...to simply blame President Bush and Vice President Cheney. We have free speech, a free press, a Congress, independent courts, checks and balances - we are all responsible for the decisions that are made in this country."

Yes, Bush is us. (And for those who say, "Hey, he ain't me!" I say, "Democracy isn't about I, it's a 'we' thing.") But he's showing us much more than our inclination to war or revenge. This is, after all, a presidency born of a breakdown in our most sacred collective act: voting for president.

American democracy is in the throes of systemic breakdown.

The level of our national discourse is a disgrace.

Voter turnout? We rank 139th out of 172 countries. Aren't you proud?

A large percentage of the news media - especially broadcast, where the vast majority of Americans get their information - fails us daily.

Our elected officials in Washington are so reliant on big bucks that they find it hard to think straight or do their jobs, as in providing serious oversight and demanding accountability.

We are not educating our children well.

Our health care has severe problems. We're 39th in infant mortality. Anybody got a good excuse for this?

How much more needs to go badly before people demand some serious across-the-board fixing?! Well, more than fixing, actually - more like  fast-track evolution.

Which brings me to my best possible spin on the current Bush presidency.

Years ago, I heard a parable that charmed me. It went like this:

An angel is told that s/he is being sent to be born as a human on earth. The angel, devastated at the notion of being unable to see God, makes this one request, "Please, please, if I have to be a human, grant me life where I never take my eyes off God for a second." Wish granted, the angel is born as God's greatest enemy on earth."

For the last six+ years- ever since that shameful metaphor in Florida -  I have been contemplating this version -

Just before birth, an immature soul makes one fervent request, "Pleeeze, pleeeze, pleeeze - I wanna be famous! Make me the most unforgettable President ever! I want to be unforgettable! " Wish granted, George W. Bush is born in a position to become the Worst USA President Ever... a wake-up call to the American people to begin treating their country with the respect and care it deserves...to start acting like grown-ups, not democracy's babies."

But of course, it's our choice.  American renaissance - taking the next evolutionary step in our  democracy, where people demand more power over multiple essential systems... or continuing downward spiral into powerlessness?

This is a test of us. Not George Bush.

 

"outmoded, amateurish and unreliable"

Well, there it was again this morning - right there at the top of the New York Times front page - yet another story that captures, in blazing metaphor, the underlying truth of America's six-year sleepwalk through the wilderness...

Interrogation Methods Are Criticized

WASHINGTON, May 29 — As the Bush administration completes secret new rules governing interrogations, a group of experts advising the intelligence agencies are arguing that the harsh techniques used since the 2001 terrorist attacks are outmoded, amateurish and unreliable.

The psychologists and other specialists, commissioned by the Intelligence Science Board, make the case that more than five years after the Sept. 11 attacks, the Bush administration has yet to create an elite corps of interrogators trained to glean secrets from terrorism suspects.

While billions are spent each year to upgrade satellites and other high-tech spy machinery, the experts say, interrogation methods — possibly the most important source of information on groups like Al Qaeda — are a hodgepodge that date from  the 1950s, or are modeled on old Soviet practices...

...The science board critique comes as ethical concerns about harsh interrogations are being voiced by current and former government officials. The top commander in Iraq, Gen. David H. Petraeus sent a letter to troops this month warning that “expedient methods” using force violated American values.

Outmoded. Dated from the fifties. Amateurish (Heck of a job, Brownie. Worse, this.). Violating American values (1, 2, 3...).  Unreliable (A, B, C...). Yes indeed, key words for understanding the actual essence of Bush "leadership."   

The Story keeps being revealed like this within dozens and dozens of smaller stories. For anyone who cares to pay attention, it's all tumbling out...

RELIGARE: to reconnect, to re-link...perhaps re-weave

Over there on the sidebar is a section called RELIGARE. Today I added Matthew Fox's 95 Theses for the Third Millennium.

Matthew Fox nailed his 95 Theses, calling for a new Reformation...on the door of Wittenburg Cathedral, the same place Martin Luther posted his 95 Theses in 1517. Dr. Fox was protesting Cardinal Ratzinger, the Chief Inquisitor of our time, getting himself elected pope.

"Getting himself elected" ... hmmmm... do I detect a pattern at work?

Fox is calling for necessary growth in the church, just as we need to effect the same for American democracy. It's worth reading them all, just for the spirit of this matter... but here are some of my personal favorites:

13. Spirituality and religion are not the same thing.

11. Religion is not necessary, but spirituality is.

40. The Holy Spirit is perfectly capable of working through participatory democracy. Hierarchies can interfere with the work of the Spirit.

45. "Joy is the human's noblest act." (Aquinas) Is our culture promoting joy?

61. Interconnectivity is not only a law of physics and nature, but forms the basis of community and compassion.

69. Loyalty and obedience are never a greater virtue than conscience and justice.

71. A church more preoccupied with sexual wrongs than with the wrongs of injustice is itself sick.

72. Since homosexuality is found among 464 species and in 8 percent of any given human population, it is altogether natural for those who are born that way and is a gift from God and nature to the greater community.

73. Homophobia in any form is a serious sin against love of neighbor and a sin of ignorance of the richness and diversity of God's creation.

81. Another test of right action is this: Is what I am doing beautiful or not?

84. The Dark Night of the Soul is a learning place of great depth. Stillness is required.

85. Not only is there a Dark Night of the Soul but also a Dark Night of Society and a Dark Night of our Species.

91. Three highways into the heart are silence, love, and grief.

95. True intelligence includes feeling, sensitivity, and beauty...

19:51

Required viewing: Charlie Rose conversation (5.14.2007) with three young Iraqi journalists. Well, let me clarify: Ali Fadhil planned to be a doctor. Zeyad Kasim was a dentist until it became too dangerous to show up at his clinic. Ayub Nuri graduated from teacher's college to be an elementary school teacher. Now, they all just work at getting at the truth of their own country. Give them 19:51 minutes of your time. Listen to the energy behind their words, look into their eyes - compare what you see there with the faces of Kristol and Perle and Cheney and Bush and Rice and...  and then tell me which group "gets it". Who is giving you the true picture?

Someone should give these guys a TV show. Put all three of them at a round table and let them conduct discussions with Perle and Kristol and...

PBS? LinkTV? Discovery TV?

Children at the Museum

There were very young children at the museum yesterday. I couldn’t help noticing them.

The Greek and I celebrated our wedding anniversary by taking a weekday off and going to the Picasso And American Art exhibit at SFMOMA. Fascinating to observe how different artists responded to Picasso’s genius. 

In 1939, Picasso had his first big show in the states. Young emerging artists such as Pollock and Louise Bourgeois attended the exhibit and fell into tortured, self-conscious artist mode. Bourgeois stopped painting for a month. Pollock bought a book on Picasso and later threw it against a wall in a fit of rage, screaming, "That guy thought of everything!" Picasso single-handedly shattered their dreams.

Early emulation seems to have followed two distinct tracks – some, like Ashile Gorky, spent a lifetime copying Picasso’s work; others were set free within themselves and what they tapped there had a profound integrity. There’s a small, vibrant piece by Lee Krassner that, however clearly inspired by The Pic, is entirely her own. And is there a better, more original painting on earth than De Kooning’s Woman And Bicycle?  As of yesterday, I can assure you, it must be witnessed in person; no reproduction captures it.

But perhaps I spent the longest time standing in front of Pollock. In fact, I circled back to his stuff twice.

Flashback: A long weekend trip to New York City with my family when I was six. We went to the Guggenheim. I remember thinking – knowing, really – that the art  there mattered, that these works captured something deep and important, and I was interested in whatever that was. I asked many questions. Too many, probably.  At one point, we were staring at a large canvas of what seemed like paint splatters. What was this? My mother said, “It’s a  Jackson Pollock,” in a way that made his name count. I asked more questions. She responded to my six-year-old self, “Perhaps you need to just take time with it. Why don’t you sit over there and study it?”

(For all I know, this was the day it started: “Be quiet. Pay attention. Figure it out.” – This was Mom’s most constant directive throughout the eighteen years I spent under her daily guidance.)

As I stood in front of Pollock yesterday, I think I recognized what must have jarred me when I was six. How did Pollock manage to do that? To reach down, tap the deepest reservoir of energy in his soul and manage to bring it up, up, up through his body, down his arms and out his hands onto his canvas. There’s nothing random about those works. They are revelatory blueprints. As true as a thing gets.

In fact, in SFMOMA’s permanent collection, there is an earlier Pollock that seems to peel back the process in his quest. At the bottom is a slightly abstract creature – crocodile?… alligator? – surrounded in black. At the top there are smaller, mythical/primal creatures – like those anthropomorphic birdmen in petroglyphs. In between, there is an organized pattern of splatters. It’s as if the "monster" down low was still waiting for him, the upper mythical creatures were holding a place for some future holy thing, and the paint between was still a process of too much thinking. Too much for Pollock, that is. To what extent did the frustration of , "That guy thought of everything!" free Pollock to give up thinking altogether and work straight from the deep without it?

Which reminds me of my favorite line from the movie –

“You’ve done it, Pollock. You’ve cracked it wide open." - Lee Krassner

So there I was yesterday, as an adult and glad of the life experience that allowed me to consciously recognize what was in front of me. As for those who still dismiss the splatters, I decided yesterday they are either fearful or not fully alive, and too bad for them.

Throughout the exhibit, I kept finding myself standing next to very young children, who – hallelujah -  had been brought to a sophisticated museum show.

There was the infant carried high on the shoulder of her father, whose ears were plugged into the museum’s audio tour. The tiny girl would babble and coo, and the father would periodically respond by repeating a narration line from his headset

"Though Picasso never set foot in America, the protean artist had a profound impact..."

."..Weber was the first to…"

"...devouring father..."

There was a little boy, I’d guess four. His father would stop in front of certain works with him and - not saying a word, explaining nothing – would point to a seeming body part in the work, then touch that body part on the boy. He ran his finger along in the air just off the ridge of a nose, then gently ran the same finger down the boy’s nose. The boy reached up to stroke his own nose. The father then put his index and middle fingers out toward the nostrils, then fit those two fingers to the boy’s. Throughout, the little boy had a serious, accepting face.  The two of them, working together, seemed to be putting the artworks into the boy’s body.

You just never know with kids – how such early experiences might “go in” … to rise again later.

At the very least, a memory might rise and make one grateful to be more than young.

Thanks, Mom.

UPDATE: Oh, here- Splatter away!